Chandler's Ford Today

humour

Give a Girl Some Graphite

By Leave a Comment

For a pre-Christmas treat I took my wife on a special trip. She dressed beautifully in mainly white with her large sunhat and a pair of gold lame shoes. I like to give a girl a good time and I had heard of this place up in the hills near Kurunegalla in the centre of Sri Lanka. Not many girls get a chance to visit there.

We drove up a narrow lane through an attractive area of jungle to a small settlement with a couple of bungalows and installations of mining equipment. [Read more…] about Give a Girl Some Graphite

Tags: , , , , ,

Room 235

By 7 Comments

What is special about this card key that occupies a prominent place in my museum of memories? The story may amuse you, but to me it is just one episode from a long list reinforcing my lifelong suspicion that I am the unsuspecting protagonist in a never-ending series of candid camera.

I was in South Tyneside College to attend a course on high voltage electric propulsion, in connection with an investigation. I had rung ahead to a nice hotel located by the sea and asked for a room with a sea view, but when I checked in, was told that all the rooms with sea views were taken. Nothing new there; I rarely got a hotel room with a view. [Read more…] about Room 235

Tags: , , , ,

British Etiquette: a Survivor’s Guide

By 2 Comments

Someone intending to visit the UK for the first time asked me for some tips on British etiquette. This is what I came up with.

Dear Raj,

Robert Burns, the famous Scottish poet once wrote A Man’s a Man for a’ That. My advice to you therefore is – be yourself and you will be fine. However, since you ask, I will jot down some thoughts accumulated over a quarter of a century on this island. [Read more…] about British Etiquette: a Survivor’s Guide

Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

Memory: I am Sure I Knew What it Meant

By 5 Comments

My memory is leaving me.

This morning I packed a suitcase with clothes and my Hungarian goose down pillow ready for my next business trip. The intention was to leave the suitcase in the office, so I could travel at short notice. But then I met the crossword man on the platform and started chatting to him. We were soon joined by Jan, my colleague, and the three of us talked about heirlooms and how these were more valuable than Nikon cameras and so on. Generally shooting the breeze, but enough to make me forget all about my suitcase which I had stored on the luggage rack near the doors. [Read more…] about Memory: I am Sure I Knew What it Meant

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

How not to be a Party Guest

By 5 Comments

There is something quintessentially English about garden parties. They are rare events as many are washed away by our capricious climate.

Last year we did not have one. The memory of the year before was too strong. Everyone was indoors. Our BBQ chef slaved under the garage up-and-over doors to shelter from the rain. He did a good job but the garage still smells of sausages.

[Read more…] about How not to be a Party Guest

Tags: , , , ,

Always Read the Label

By 6 Comments

When you are at your most vulnerable, you need all the help you can get. Do you get it? No. I live in a house full of women and I am well looked after in the most part but these girls turn the bathroom into a minefield.

There you are, in the shower, naked, enveloped in steam, water streaming into your eyes. You need shampoo. Your groping hand soon knocks several plastic bottles down into the shower pan. [Read more…] about Always Read the Label

Tags: , , , ,

Vicar Of Dibley By The Chameleons: Brilliant Show

By 7 Comments

Chandler’s Ford Chameleon Theatre Company did it again!

I saw the comedy The Vicar of Dibley with two teenagers last Thursday at The Ritchie Memorial Hall in Chandler’s Ford.

What a stunning show! [Read more…] about Vicar Of Dibley By The Chameleons: Brilliant Show

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Glastonbury 2014 Ramblings

By 9 Comments

My wife Lyn and I worked at Glastonbury for a charity called Festival Medical Services (FMS). I worked as a driver and Lyn a first aider.

FMS are responsible for providing medical services ranging from first-aid and paramedic to surgery and psychiatry. [Read more…] about Glastonbury 2014 Ramblings

Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

Lost and Found

By 4 Comments

I have just gone through a period of losing things. At least I hope I have gone through it and will not lose any more essential and valuable objects. Some years ago odd socks would appear and no matter where I looked the partner for it never turned up. After hanging around in my sock drawer for a while I would throw the sock away.

The next day the other one would turn up. [Read more…] about Lost and Found

Tags: , , , , , , ,

Eye Of The Pacific Gray Whale

By Leave a Comment

I took this photograph of a Pacific Gray Whale recently in the San Ignacio Lagoon off the coast of Baja, Mexico.

Gray Whales often approach the Panga (boat) when they want to seek human interaction. They are happy to be stroked and petted as they come alongside the boat. They will even tease with a splash, a spout of  air or a head butt! [Read more…] about Eye Of The Pacific Gray Whale

Tags: , , , , , ,