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You are here: Home / Arts / Advice to My 20 Year Old Self – Allison Symes

Advice to My 20 Year Old Self – Allison Symes

April 21, 2017 By Allison Symes 8 Comments

One writing exercise that came out of my trip to Swanwick Writers’ Summer School last year was to write to my 20-year-old self with advice based on knowing now what I didn’t know back then. This was fun, really made me think and I thought at the time this could make a good CFT post because I can throw it open for you to join in. What would you tell your 20-year-old self? I am only talking in general terms for this but my list is below.

The front of The Hayes where Swanwick is held
The front of The Hayes where Swanwick is held – image by Allison Symes
The back of The Hayes
The back of The Hayes – image by Allison Symes
The lakes at Swanwick
The lakes at Swanwick – image by Allison Symes

So to a 20-year-old Allison I would say:-

1. Lighten up!

This was the first thought that immediately occurred to me! I don’t know if all 20 year olds go through the stage of taking themselves far too seriously. All I know is I did. What a complete waste of time and energy… life is far too short for this sort of thing.

Learn to lighten up - image via Pixabay
Learn to lighten up – image via Pixabay

2. Start writing!

I have had a life-long interest in reading and stories. My big regret is not starting writing sooner than I did because nobody can tell you how long it will take you to get published (assuming you want to achieve that). Also the sooner you start, the sooner you can learn from your mistakes and improve on what you do and the sooner hopefully publication will happen. I can’t emphasize this enough to my younger self. I would also tell her to come on, let’s get on with this now, shall we? You’ve nothing to lose. You will end up being published for non-fiction AND fiction but it will take you a long time so start sooner!

Look, needs no batteries - image via Pixabay
Look, needs no batteries – image via Pixabay

 

Wouldn't be without this though - image via Pixabay
Wouldn’t be without this though – image via Pixabay

3. Never underestimate how long something worthwhile (like writing well) will take to achieve.

I console myself with the thought that we all do this at some point. I think it is a question we all serve an apprenticeship of some sort (in my case in learning how to create work that people will publish (sometimes anyway!).

4. You will develop a love of classical music, honestly. Start now. There’s more to it than you realise.

Classical music sheets - image via Pixabay
Classical music sheets – image via Pixabay

Life is too short not to appreciate music. As with books, funnily enough, I think a wide range of tastes here is good for your own development. By 20, I was already heavily into rock, pop and soul music (and still am) but classical was the great unknown. Knowing what I do now, I should’ve explored this whole area of music a lot sooner than I did. Oh and you will develop a love for operatic pieces (Nessun Dorma for one) and choral pieces (Miserere). (You will also love Danse Macabre which will be the theme for the book trailer for your first book but that’s another story!).

5. Don’t put off reading. Read whenever you can.

Life will get busier as you take on more responsibilities and while you will still read, and always will, you will have less time so make the most of now. This is the time to read those classics you always wanted to read. Also read widely to help you develop your non-fiction writing for later on.

The Joy of Reading - image via Pixabay
The Joy of Reading – image via Pixabay

6. Make the most of now generally anyway

You can’t start doing this too soon. Think about what you would like to do with your life. Be open to new ideas. Your writing journey, yes you will have one, will take you in different directions and you will love it all. Don’t restrict yourself unnecessarily.

7. Look forward to technological changes.

Look forward to being able to use an electronic reader for your own personal library, as well as still enjoying the joys of the paperback. Look forward to the internet and Facebook and being able to do all manner of things on a computer that, aged 20, you are simply not able to do as the technology is not with you yet. Embrace it. Use it to help your writing.

Technology - image via Pixabay
Technology – image via Pixabay

8. Writing Conferences – go to them!

Do this as soon as you can and don’t put it off, thinking you’ll be out of place. All novice writers feel like that. See the conferences as a chance to practice networking as well as learning from the courses themselves.

Conferences are useful for writers - image via Pixabay
Conferences are useful for writers – image via Pixabay

9. Talking of networking…

The way to overcome nerves here is to see it as a chance to discuss what you write and find out about the writing of the person you’re talking to. See it as a chance to break down the ice, maybe make some long distance writing friends you keep in touch with thanks to the developments like Facebook I outlined, and your opportunity to spread the word.

10. Swimming

You will develop a real love for this but start sooner! Fitness is a wonderful thing to have and by starting at 20, rather than much later (as I actually did), you will get the health and other benefits far sooner. You will also develop a real wariness when driving around Fleming Park car park given people don’t always follow the system properly. You hope that the new pool will have a car park where the system is marked out more clearly and that it will be one way in and out for the whole thing, rather than just part of it.

Swimming Pool - image via Pixabay
Swimming Pool – image via Pixabay

 

Fleming Park - image from CFT archives
Fleming Park – image from CFT archives

11. Dog Ownership

This won’t happen until much later but it would do no harm to look into this now so that you are ready for both the responsibilities and challenges of dog ownership. Word to the wise, when this happens, never be afraid to be seen talking to your dog. In the dog owning world, you are considered odd if you don’t talk to your dog. (See Facebook for more on this!).

12. Classical Concerts

Get along to some! (This is something I still have to do but I do hope to correct this failing by the end of this year!).

13. Support your Local Theatre Group/National Theatre Live

You will develop a love for local theatre and National Theatre Live, which will introduce you to Shakespeare. Would do no harm if you find out more about the Bard now. Get along to as many of the plays as you can. You will find them educational, entertaining and realise just why Will is our greatest writer and always will be.

14. Driving

You will learn to drive later than most but will come to love it. You will hate parking (especially in hospitals and Fleming Park) but will discover every local driver feels like that. You will also be stunned at just how busy the Asda roundabout can get. Best be prepared for all this now.

Okay, over to you.  Just what would you tell your younger self and why?

Read interviews with Chandler’s Ford writer Allison Symes: Part 1 and Part 2.

Read blog posts by Allison Symes published on Chandler’s Ford Today.

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About Allison Symes

I'm a published flash fiction and short story writer, as well as a blogger. My fiction work has appeared in anthologies from Cafelit and Bridge House Publishing.

My first flash fiction collection, From Light to Dark and Back Again, was published by Chapeltown Books in 2017.

My follow-up, Tripping the Flash Fantastic, was published by Chapeltown Books in 2020.

I adore the works of many authors but my favourites are Jane Austen, P.G. Wodehouse and Terry Pratchett.

I like to describe my fiction as fairytales with bite.

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Mary Peterson says

    April 21, 2017 at 4:20 pm

    I would say keep a record of where and when photos are taken and who is in them. I am just transfering my photo archive into digital format and am so sorry that I’ve forgotten names of friends and places. You think you’ll never forget but you do!!! Oh I wish my 20 year old self had kept a diary as I do now.

    Reply
    • Janet Williams says

      April 21, 2017 at 5:29 pm

      Great advice! I dealt with my old photos a few months ago, and like you, forgot about some names and places and their significance. I got rid of these photos (quite a lot of them!). Now I only have some photos left and I’ll transfer them digitally. So I’ll end up having only a very small collection. Memories are good, but confusing memories (if you don’t even know who is who) are not good.

      Reply
      • Allison Symes says

        April 21, 2017 at 10:49 pm

        Photos, like books, are something I find incredibly difficult to get rid of because I know even if I don’t recall something, there’s a good chance other members of my family will or the memory will come back later. That’s happened a lot with old photos.

        Reply
    • Allison Symes says

      April 21, 2017 at 10:46 pm

      Great idea with the photos. It’s amazing how much changes so quickly. Long gone are the days of looking forward to getting your prints back from the chemist! And yes you do forget names, places etc… the only comfort there I think is we are all guilty of that one.

      Reply
  2. Mike Sedgwick says

    April 21, 2017 at 8:06 pm

    I am reminded of an interview on Radio 3 where John Betjeman was asked about poetry, architecture and the way his life had worked out. It was all very intellectual.
    ‘Any regrets?’ asked the interviewer.
    ‘I wish I had had more sex.’ was the response.
    After and awkward pause, the interviewer quickly changed the subject.

    I agree about labelling photos and I am guilty. But I will never forget that wonderful holiday in, er, where was it now? Spain, France, no, must have been Italy, I think.

    Reply
    • Allison Symes says

      April 21, 2017 at 10:51 pm

      A great example of the dangers of asking an honest question is getting an even more honest reply! Still love his Slough poem though I strongly suspect the residents don’t.

      Reply

Trackbacks

  1. LIVING IN A MAGICAL WORLD PART 1 – Allison Symes: Collected Works says:
    April 22, 2017 at 1:22 am

    […] post is based on a writing exercise I was set at Swanwick Summer Writers’ School last year.  Advice to my 20-Year-Old Self shares what I would tell my younger self if I could.  The first thing I thought of was to lighten […]

    Reply
  2. REVIEWS, FAIRYTALE RELATIONSHIPS, AND STORY IDEAS – Allison Symes: Collected Works says:
    May 19, 2018 at 12:19 am

    […] wrote a Chandler’s Ford Today piece on this a while ago where I discussed what I’d tell my 20-year-old self.  I thoYouught […]

    Reply

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